


Comfort

by thedollars666



Series: coming together [11]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Episode: s07e18 Heroes (2), Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-20
Updated: 2015-07-20
Packaged: 2018-04-10 07:00:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4381883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedollars666/pseuds/thedollars666
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack comforts his grieving lover who was more effected then he had let on. The tragic events that happened on P3X-666 hit everyone hard. Daniel receives a letter addressed to him after the funeral, from one Janet Fraiser.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Comfort

Daniel ducked in response to the blasts of staff weapons and gun shots going on around him. This was suppose to be a simple rescue mission, he tried to focus on helping Janet give the wounded young man on the floor medical treatment. All the while thinking, praying that wherever Jack was right now; that he was ok. Daniel would have much rather been at his side, but Jack had told him it was too much, too much for him. As much as Daniel had been trained, Jack never wanted him so much under heavy fire. Daniel grabbed the man's hand, his focus coming back to him as the man before him screamed out in agony. A voice from an airman came on the radio, “Colonel O'Neill, our position is being compromised! We're not going to be able to hold the Gate for long!” Daniel almost froze, his breath catching, waiting...waiting for a response. Come on Jack, respond, let me hear your voice.

“It doesn't matter. We're not gonna be able to hold—is posit— for—long!” and breath out, Jack, Jack was still ok.

“Colonel, I'm gonna need more time to stabilize this patient. He can't be moved yet!” Janet's shouting brought him back to his senses again as he continued to assist.

“I can't believe I'm not gonna see my son” Simon Wells shouted in agitation, his voice full of pain.

“Stay focused, stay focused. You-you-you know it's a boy right?” Daniel stuttered out, god this was insane. This was crazy, they were in such hot water; this wasn't looking good.

“Tell me- tell me the truth, I'm not gonna make it”

“You're going to be fine” Daniel tried to reassure, everything seemed so hopeless.

 “Doctor Jackson? Please-please-please, just let me just tell my wife—Let me tell my wife that—“ Wells screamed out gripping onto Daniel tighter, Daniel's heart clenched for him; he knew what agony like that felt like.

“Okay...okay” Daniel reluctantly hands Janet the I.V bag he was holding and grabs the camcorder. “You can tell her yourself”

“I'm so sorry about this. Ah! I love you so much…God, I-I just-I just wanted…Oh God! God! Shut it off! Shut it off! I don't want her to see me die! Please! God!” Janet looks directly at Wells, she brushes his hair away from his face as Daniel shifts the camera angle from him to her in a jolt as they continue to get surrounded by heavy fire.

“Simon! Simon look at me! You are not going to die, okay?” Janet shouts at him, sheer determination to keep her word. It calms the young airmen as she continues speaking to him, Daniel was in turmoil; Janet needed him here; but there was so much worrying going on for his lover who was right in the middle of that vicious war zone. His hands were shaking so much it was hard to keep the camera steady. “I did not come all the way out here for nothing. Now, I've stemmed the bleeding. We're going to get you on a stretcher. We're going to get you home with your family in no time, okay? Now you hang in there, Airman!”

“Yes Ma'am!” Daniel crouches suddenly, dropping the camera as a staff blast flashes across them; it strikes Janet in the chest. “Ah! What happened? Is she hit?”

She lay unmoving, her eyes wide open; Daniel screams at her as he kneels beside her. “Janet!?” an airman by the name of Bosworth fires at the Jaffa and takes him out.

“You're clear. Doctor Jackson! Sorry...”

Daniel held his hands to her chest, he didn't know what to do; he shouts out in anguish. “I need a medic! Fraiser's hit, I need a medic!” he then clicks his radio, his hand shaking; his whole body shaking with emotion. “Sierra golf niner, Doctor Fraiser's been hit, position...aah...god, I need a medic!”

…...........................

Daniel rushed down into the corridor, Jack! Oh god, Jack had been hit. He couldn't take this, he couldn't lose a close friend and his love all in the same day. He took gentle steps into the infirmary, his feet felt like they were walking of their own accord because he didn't have the energy to use them. Jack was there, lying on the hospital bed; hooked up to an I.V. He was going to be fine, the new vest insert had saved his life. Daniel stood at his side, he was weary of the camera's but he brushed his hand over Jack's lightly. Jack turned his head as his eyes fluttered open, he smiled weakly at him. “Daniel...”

“Jack, they said...that you-you were gonna be fine...”

“Yeh, full recovery.... I'm glad you're safe too” Daniel nodded, Jack frowned when he felt Daniel's shaking hand against his; “Daniel...?” Daniel breathed out deeply, not looking up, just looking at their hands; trying his best to keep his composure. “Daniel, look at me.....” Daniel looked up, Jack could see the hurt in his lovers eyes, reflecting back in his own.

“I um...I should- I have um...” Daniel stroked Jack's hand with his thumb, squeezed it gently and then let go. “I'll come back soon...”

Jack watched Daniel leave the room, that whole mission was completely fucked up.

…...............................

Jack pulled his black top over his bandaged abdomen as Sam knocked and made her entrance. “Sir? I heard you were up and around” Jack turned toward her, half disappointed that it wasn't Daniel.

“Yeah. Still a little tender. But they said I could go home” he shifted with a pained grunt.

“We're lucky that staff blast hit you where it did. The new vest insert works well”

Jack pulled a solemn face “Didn't help Fraiser much”

Sam looks away sadly, then back up at him. “No” she tried to remain composed, tried not to show her emotions.

“How's Cassie?”

“She's a strong kid, she survives, you know”

“Yep” Jack got up from the bed and placed a green BDU jacket on. “You speaking at the memorial?”

Sam nods her head. “Sir...I just wanted to say...when you were lying there...I- I'm really glad you're ok” she was losing the fight with herself, she could no longer hide her sorrow.

Daniel walks toward the infirmary, he'd been cleared to leave and was going to take Jack home. He appeared in the doorway but stops there, seeing that Sam was already talking to him and he didn't want to interrupt. Sam begins to weep as Jack approaches her, Daniel had been so caught up in his own emotions, he hadn't even thought about how Sam must be feeling. God, and Cassie...everything was so screwed up at the moment. “Come here” he heard Jack say and watched him embrace her. It was that moment that their eyes locked, Jack smiled sadly at him; Daniel gave him a little wave with a weak smile of his own.

Daniel then mouthed 'I'll wait for you outside' and then left them alone. There was a part of him that felt a twinge of jealously, he'd always thought something might be between Jack and Sam; but he shook that thought right out of his head.

The United States and SGC flags were set up on the ramp with a podium, wreath and red flag. A bugler standing on the ramp and playing Taps. The room, filled with SGC personnel, military in full dress uniforms, Daniel and Teal'c in all black suits. Everyone very somber. The documentary crew were also dressed for the occasion, filming the memorial. Once the bugler finished, Sam approached the podium.

“Janet Fraiser was an extraordinary person. She was kind and funny and talented. Above all, she was courageous. Try as I might, I could not find the words to honour her, to do justice to her life. Thankfully, I got some help.” Sam looks at Teal'c who nods in Acknowledgement. “While words alone may not be enough, there are some names that might do. We often talk about those that give their lives in the service of their country. And while Janet Fraiser did just that, that's not what her life was about” Her voice trembles for a moment, then she rallies. “The following are the names of the men and women who did not die in service, but who are in fact alive today because of Janet: Major Samantha Carter. Doctor Daniel Jackson. Colonel Jack O'Neill. Teal'c… …Sergeant Connie Smith. Major Ian Hules. Senior Airman Simon Wells…”

….........................................

A more private wake was being held at Jack's cabin, some of Janet's closer friends and her adopted daughter. Sam approaches Jack, dressed in a white blouse and jeans. “Sir? I'm going to take Cassie home with me tonight, she's not holding up so well”

“Is she ok?”

“She will be, eventually. But, have you seen Daniel? She wants to say goodbye to him before we leave soon. No one has seen him since we came back here”

“I'll find him” Jack leaves the conversation he was engaging in with the general and Teal'c to go in search of Daniel, He hadn't seen him in a while either.

After searching amongst the people in the cabin and around the outside of it, where some people were still talking. Jack made his way up the ladder to the roof, he stopped on the top and sighed when he finally spotted him. Daniel was sat with his legs propped up, still in his black suit from the memorial. Jack swung his leg over and reached the man in a few paces. “Everyone is looking for you” he said quietly.

“I'll be down in a minute” Daniel breathed out. “I just needed to get away for a bit”

“Are you ok?” Jack said as he sat down beside him.

Daniel's breath became visible in the evening air. “No...”

Jack sighed again, they couldn't risk any physical contact yet; Jack just lay a hand on Daniel's shoulder. “You can talk to me, tell me what's on your mind”

“I-we should head back down, this day isn't about me” Daniel shrugged and stood up.

“Well, later then. And if you're not gonna talk; at least give me a hand up, since I came all the way up here” Daniel smiled lightly and reached his hand down. Jack took it and was almost eye level with him again. “Cassie wants to say goodbye before she goes. Carter's taking her home with her tonight”

Daniel swallowed the lump in his throat. “How- how is she?”

“Holding up, she's having a hard time right now. But. She'll be ok”

Daniel nodded and followed Jack off the roof.

…...........................

The crowd had thawed out while Jack had gone to find Daniel, leaving only SG1 and Cassie left.

“Take care, I'll come and see you when I can” Daniel said as he pulled Cassie into a hug.

“Thank you...you guys are the best” she replied and then proceeded to hug Jack.

“We're all here if you need anything...just Hollar”

“I know, thank you...” she then turned back to Daniel and hands him an envelope. “Mom said, if-” Sam placed an arm around her as she began to well. “If anything were to happen to her....she wanted you to have this”

Daniel took the envelope and kissed her on the forehead. “Ok sweetheart...go and get some rest, ok?” Daniel almost welled up himself.

“You crashing here tonight Daniel?” Jack asked in a casual tone.

Daniel nodded, “If you don't mind-”

“No problem”

“I will take my leave with Major Carter and Cassandra to make sure they get home safely” Teal'c offered, Sam smiled and then nodded at Daniel and Jack.

“Goodnight sir....Daniel”

“Night Sam..”

“Goodnight Carter”

Teal'c bowed his head and he followed Sam and Cassie out into the night. Daniel and Jack stood in the doorway, seeing them off and then finally shut the door when they drove away. Daniel walked through to the living room as Jack locked up behind them. Jack walked in, following him and gave Daniel's shoulder a gentle squeeze. “Just gonna make some coffee, want some?”

Daniel replied with a grunt as he picked out the folded piece of paper from the envelope he'd just opened. Jack gave his shoulder another squeeze and then left to make coffee.

To Daniel

~If you have this, then I can only imagine Cassie has given it to you because something bad has happened to me. I have so many things I want to say, but I guess I'll just come out with the important stuff; since I know that life goes on and that you're busy saving the world, as usual.~

Daniel smiled as his eyes began to moisten as he continued to read, he could practically hear her voice.

~I really want to say that being your friend has been such an honour and I'm really glad to have met you, you're the most wonderful kind hearted man I've ever met. Never stop being who you are and I know that Cassie is in the hands of such brilliant and caring friends. I know that you're going to lookout for her like everyone else, but please try and take care of yourself too. Keep safe and don't pull any more stupid stunts, at least...try anyway.

I really am glad you've found someone special Daniel, I know he can be a hard man at times. But I know how much he loves you, and I really am happy for you both. That you have both been able to find love in each other, your secret is safe; I only knew by observation. Take care of each other, you and Jack need one another more then ever; and if you ever doubt yourselves...know that at least one good friend thought the world of you and couldn't be more happier for you both.~

Daniel was covering his mouth by this point, his eyes clouded over but his tears remained unshed.

~I guess I'm rambling now, if you'tr sitting down then you're either in your office or in Jack's cabin and no doubt the Colonel will want to see this too. I love you all, take care

love Janet Fraiser  
x x~

Jack came around with two mugs and placed them on the table. “Danny?” Jack frowned when he sat beside him. “What is it? What's it say?”

Daniel handed over the letter with a shaking hand, “S-she knew...all along...she knew”

Jack took the letter with a confused expression “What?” he then scanned over it quickly then gasped. “God..”

“Why- why didn't she saying anything? Were we...were we that obvious? Do you think anyone else has figured it out?”

“Relax Daniel, I don't think anyone else knows. Even if they suspect- you know, DADT and all. She was our Doctor, she was so good at what she did; her observation skills probably set off bells. Especially when either one of us were in the infirmary. She told me once that whenever you would come out of unconscious land, whether you knew it or not, my name would always pass your lips first”

Daniel looked up at him, “Really?” he then looked down again at his hands. “I- I didn't even realize”

“I kind of laughed because she said it was cute, I just sort of shrugged it off, but apparently I would scan around the room whenever I woke up from sleepy land. She knew who I was looking for, always, she didn't let on though. At least not until I literally asked where you were, if you were ok. She'd just smile at me and then a few minutes later you were there...well, some of the time”

Daniel grabbed the two mugs, handing one to Jack and took a gulp. “I can't believe she knew, she risked her career to keep that a secret. I wished she'd have said something....I- I could've thanked her, in person.”

Jack rubbed the back of Daniel's neck, “Don't do that...”

“What?”

“You're guilt tripping”

“Am not”

“Yes you are, I know you-this is what you do, how you act”

“I'm fine”

“Ak!” Jack held up a finger “Don't start”

Daniel rolled his eyes and they finished their coffee in silence. Jack watched him, he knew this routine, Daniel was either going to keep up the silence until he was ready to talk. Or he was going to bottle it and release his anguish in one burst of emotion. If only he'd just talk to start with, it would make Jack's life a hell of a lot easier. But then, Jack was no saint when it came to 'talking' either.

Daniel put his empty mug on the table, “Let's go to bed...I'm tired”

“Gotta get new covers and sheets on the bed first; didn't get time this morning” Jack said as he grabbed the two mugs and took them to the kitchen.

Daniel hung his head with a sigh, “Right” Jack had stripped the bed that morning while Daniel was fiddling with his black suit in the mirror. They had left everything as it was when they were ready and didn't even have any breakfast. Daniel got up and passed Jack in the kitchen, gave him a peck on the cheek and then Jack heard the bathroom door in the bedroom shut.

“You better not be Guilt tripping on me Daniel” Jack muttered to himself as he placed the mugs back in their rightful place in the cupboard.

When they were both ready for bed, Jack in grey slacks with a white vest top; Daniel in dark blue boxers and no top. They worked together to get the bedding on so they could finally settle and relax. Jack was working on the cover for their quilt and Daniel was pulling the sheet over the mattress in place. Jack threaded a corner to the end, he looked up when Daniel gave a frustrated grunt for what had been the third time. He could see him struggle trying to get the last corner of his side over, usually it wasn't a problem; but given the stress of the day, it looked like Daniel was at breaking point. “Daniel-” Daniel somewhat growled when the edge pinged off again, Jack winced.

“Stupid thing- stay on” Daniel said through gritted teeth. Jack could see him getting more and more annoyed.

“Daniel, leave it- I'll help in a minute”

“No” Daniel replied, grabbing the corner again. “I can do it” Jack sighed and continued his own task of manoeuvring the quilt to the right angles. Daniel pulled on the sheet, he must have pulled too hard since another corner came out of place. “GOD DAMMIT! WHY! WHY!” Daniel slammed his hands on the mattress, this had gone far beyond the annoying sheet now. “WHY!? DAMN IT!”

“Daniel!” Jack dropped the quilt and quickly reached his lover's side as Daniel angrily took it out on the bed.

“I COULDN'T SAVE HER! I DIDN'T PROTECT...I didn't see him Jack-...” Daniel collapsed on his knees, his anger subsiding to a different emotion. “God....”

“Shhh, it's ok, it's ok...” Jack grabbed hold of him as Daniel sank back against his embrace.

“I didn't see him....she's...dead and I didn't- I couldn't save her...”

“It's ok...just let it out”

“It's my fault...”

“No! It wasn't your fault, don't ever say that”

Daniel clutched Jack's arm with apology. “We...we were friends...why...”

“I know, I know” Jack rubbed Daniel's back, god, why did he always do this? The man would try so hard to be brave, to keep his emotions in tact. He'd try so hard and- he shouldn't have to, Daniel was not military, he couldn't always handle it; then this would happen, one big emotion burst. A totally different Daniel would suffice for just a few moments, the man was shaking against him. “It'll get easier...”

“I thought it might...but it never does Jack, we lose people all the time- but, it doesn't get easier...it gets harder”

“Hey, look at me” Jack pulled back and put both his palms lightly on Daniel's cheeks. “It's ok for you to grieve”

“I just- I'm trying to be stronger-”

“You don't have to, I can do that- for both of us” Jack stroked his thumb over a silent tear. “Which means you can do the grieving for both of us”

Daniel stared at him for a moment, his thoughts lost in a swirl; he didn't imagine losing someone who was that close to him, with the exception of his late wife. He'd lost colleagues, people he grew to know in the SGC, but Janet- she was a great friend, and one hell of a damn good doctor. He should have told her so. “Why didn't I tell her?”

“Tell her what?”

“How much she meant to all of us? How great of a friend she was- grateful for how much she fought to keep us alive....”

“She knew, she always knew, she said so in her letter. Please stop beating yourself up over this. None of what happened out there was your fault, she died a hero, doing her duty, you were doing yours, like I was doing mine.”

“I just feel so awful...”

“It will pass, I promise”

Daniel leant his forehead on Jack's shoulder, one of his arms coming round to clutch at the back of his vest. “I'm glad you're safe...did I tell you that? I don't think I did...”

“You did, not in so many words, but you did. I'm relieved you're safe with me too”

“What would I have done if-”

“Shh, don't think about that now...you'll only get more worked up; we're safe”

They held each other for a moment longer, until Jack was sure Daniel had calmed down. They scrambled to their feet, Daniel was silent for a few minutes, he was embarrassed, Jack could tell. They fixed the rest of the bed, threw over the quilt and settled in. Jack pulled Daniel close to him, like he always did, just before they fell asleep, or after their love making. “I love you Daniel, don't ever forget that”

“Not possible...but is it possible that I love you even more?”

Jack chuckled lightly, he always laughed when Daniel got overly sappy on him. But he didn't hate it, it was just strangely amusing. Jack kissed the back of Daniel's neck, “You tell me”

Daniel moaned softly when Jack pulled him even closer, he snuggled into the warmth and safety that was Jack's arms. “I think so...” they were quiet for a long while, Jack had thought Daniel had fallen asleep. “Jack...?”

“Yeh?”

“It's...It's gonna get easier, right?”

“Promise” Jack kissed him again, caressing over his chest and upper arm.

  
  


 


End file.
